“Our friends are scared of you, dad.” My daughters told me that when I fetched them from school one day. This pertains to how you treat other people and yourself. If you can’t control your time, I will doubt that you can control yourself.
I had commented that their friends would become quiet when I approached. I am not your buddy, and adults like me deserve to be treated with honor and respect simply on the basis of our age and experience. Say “good morning, sir” and other appropriate greetings.
On the other hand, too much self-grooming shows that you care more about yourself than her. You better know things like who the president of the country is, or how to get to your destination. If you don’t know things like that, I ask: Do you know how to take care of my child? If my daughter has to take charge and protect you in a dark alley, I would rather have her stay home. This lets me know what kind of person you were raised to be. As the saying goes, “Tell me who your friends are and I will tell you who you are.” Your parents raised you one way, but the character of your friends shows who you are or who you want to become.
If you don’t care how you appear to others, it could tell me that you don’t care how you behave. I don’t expect an honor student, but I don’t want an ignoramus taking my daughter out. Even if women have equal rights, I want my daughter to be with someone who can (if needed) take care of her. Even if you are not built like Thor, you have to be the man. Deal with problems, ask questions and come up with solutions. I expect to meet your parents at some time during your friendship with my child. I want to see how they relate to you and how you treat them. Show me the group that my daughter will be exposed to. Incidentally, my daughters’ ages are 16 and “twenteen.” In parent vision, they shall always be my babies.
I behave differently—especially when it comes to boys who want to date my daughters. A very protective, almost primal attitude sets in, and I shift into warrior mode. I feel my lips wanting to curl back exposing my teeth as I set out to rip flesh off bones.